And here we are again, on the precipice of madness…..As I face the great abyss of the summer holidays I am unsure which is the greater fear…….losing my sanity or huge weight gain.I have already had a buttermilk pancake soused in maple syrup for breakfast………….I ask where is the shame?.
I find it almost impossible to dig deep at times. It feels like it’s all or nothing. I suspect it’s because I don’t really have my sh.t together. I swing between mildly disorganised to wtf?????????? I am a deeply entrenched winger. This does at times give me a good feeling. A feeling of freedom from the drudgery of the incredibly boring minutiae of life. A feeling that I am soaring above it all, unconventional and living in the moment. Ready at a moments notice for adventure. But in reality I’m a t.at. I am not living in an exciting city somewhere at twenty with my future as a globe-trotting wonder woman at my feet. I am a 2.4 geriatric mother of two with an inability to check the calender and follow a balanced diet.
So it is in these highly pressurised moments of my life ( big old me being solely responsible for my children not maiming or scarring each other as well as coordinating fun-filled outdoor activities with others) that I find it almost impossible to turn away from the cheesey chips. A binging fog descends and I am adrift on a gluttonous sea of foodie crap.
So I am here, in the very beginning, to make a desperate last stand, an earnest plea to the irascible gods of the summer holiday………..
Where there was chaos let there be mind numbing and boring order. Where there was anarchy let there be loving and sharing sibling peace. Where there was delicious, full of sawdust, filthy sausages and chips at soft play, let there be hummus, carrot sticks and a low-fat apricot yoghurt. Where there was gloriously syrupy pancakes, let there be Special K and red milk and most of all where there was wine let there be GIN…….apparently pound for pound about half the calories………I feel like I’ve seen the light already. May the Lord be with me….
Another significant strategy of mine to create sibling peace for five minutes is this Amazeballs recipe for Millionaires Shortbread. I have tried many and found this by far to be the easiest and the most incredible.This recipe is one of my stalwarts. That sounds incredibly middle-aged but I really can’t see me ever changing it, it is that good. Millionaires Shortbread is my son’s absolute favourite. This guarantees Utopia in my house. Obviously I will just be licking the top.
PIN ME FOR LATER!